You'll Always Be My Baby

AAAAGGGHHH. This has been one very stressful week. Braeden has totally and completely messed up his sleeping schedule. He is ok sleeping though the night, but he has decided that naps during the day are no longer necessary.
I've had them both on an amazing schedule for the past 3 weeks or so, where they will both take a nap at the same time and nap for a good hour or two.
This week - all of that has been tossed out the window. For some reason Braeden just refuses. I'm not sure what's going on. Is it the week of the full moon? We discussed that in Sunday School this week. Many people think that the full moon really does play into how children act and whether they sleep well.
I don't know what it is at this point - but it needs to get fixed fast. Mommy needs a break! :)

At nighttime, when getting Braeden to sleep I will always hold him and sing him songs until he falls asleep. Well, this week also has been different during this routine. He wants to crawl out of my arms and then fall asleep on the floor. I imagine that this probably means that it is time to graduate to the toddler bed with him. BUT this really big step means that Mommy won't have any babies anymore. And that in itself makes me ball my eyes out.
Yes, I know. I am SOO happy and blessed that they are healthy and growing into beautiful children. But how do you deal with knowing that you can't hold them, rock them and cuddle them for the rest of their lives, like you've been able to do for these few precious months?
I think the saying that your mom always said when you were growing up comes into play here, "I don't care how big you get, you'll always be my baby." You really don't understand it until you have your own babies. And I just have to remember to thank God everyday for each moment I have with them.
After getting Braeden to sleep tonight, Izzy pulled me into her room to show me this new thing she could do. Chris would start reading a page of her book and then she would finish "reading" it. He apparently has read some of the books so many times that she has started memorizing them! I think this is probably the first stage of reading for her, but it's so neat to see how much she has learned in just 3 years. AND the WORDS that she knows...my goodness. The girl amazes me every day.

Changes

Needless to say....I am exhausted!! It's been a very short month (to me) since I last blogged.

I have literally lost 5 pounds. I know some of you would say, "what 5 pounds did you have to lose?!" I really did have 5 pounds I needed to lose. But, I think mostly it's that we aren't eating out nearly as much as we did while I was working. AND- I am chasing two toddlers around all day. My back hurts, my knees hurt, I have no fingernails left (because I wash my hands at least 30 times a day, and do dishes 3 times a day) and when I crawl into bed at night it takes 2 seconds for me to be snoring and drooling.

Here's a short synopsis of the last month:

We celebrated Izzy's 3rd birthday at Bouncin Kids in Morganton. It was a blast.

We've gotten to do a lot of trips to the park in the last 2 weeks because the weather has been so warm. This week not so much, it seems winter has finally hit (mid February)...blah.

Chris and I have really caught the house renovation bug.

It started with Izzy's bedroom. We had wanted forever to paint her walls and just give her room an upgrade. So we did - we painted the all wooden furniture white, painted the light pink walls yellow, got new curtains and it now looks completely different.

We cleaned out our downstairs den - it is now functional as a playroom/living area - which we have wanted to do forever. You may have seen my many posts on Facebook of items for sale. This is part of the cleaning out/downsizing/decluttering our lives thing we're trying to do.

It's so neat the things you will find when you start cleaning. At the risk of being called a hoarder, I want you to know that I have saved all of my Barbie furniture, Barbies/Barbie outfits and Dance recital costumes from my childhood. I had high hopes that one day my little girl would want to play with these things. Part of me wished that she would, but partly thought, well she'll probably want her own, "new" things. BUT this week, after naptime I decided to bring up 3 of the Barbie dolls and all of the Barbie furniture to see what Izzy thought. I got so excited breaking it all out and setting it up. It was amazing the memories that each piece brought back. It didn't help that we had just watched Toy Story 3 for the first time last week. So with each piece I was silently apologizing to it, for it's many years being stoed away and unused.

I really don't know why I was worried about it. She loved them. Of course she loved them - she's my child - she loves Barbies, baby dolls and dressing up. (For now, that is - hopefully for a while, but we'll see).

Yes, I caught you Braeden. He loved it just as much as Izzy did. I think they ended up playing with these for close to an hour. Which anything longer than 10 minutes in this household is a pretty big deal.

So maybe next week we'll break out the rest of the barbies or even the dance costumes.

Dressing Up

I seriously could do an entire blog on the day to day outfits that Izzy decides she wants to wear. I told Chris yesterday that I don't even know why we bother buying her clothes. All she wants to wear these days are church dresses and princess dresses. This blue coat (princess dress to her) is a size 4 - a little too big still yet - but that's what she decided for yesterday's attire. It is like pulling teeth to even get her toTHINK about wearing pants.

This was the outfit of choice from today. Her grandmother, Ging - as she calls her, helped out with this one. At least the tights match the shoes and the purse matches the hat - right??? ugh.

I have given up at this point.

I'm looking forward to when everything has to match. At least I'm hoping that day comes....

We have really enjoyed playing together these few first weeks we've had together. Last week Izzy made up a song about how mommy stays home with her now. I love that she is as excited about it as I am.

Each day I try to incoorporate some kind of craft. It really encourages their hand eye coordination, gets their creativity flowing and just seems to provide a little moment of structure in a somewhat chaotic day.

I found this idea online the other day...

Sticking crayons through an egg carton and coloring on paper underneath it.












Very simple - but they really enjoyed it. Izzy was all about changing the the crayons out. And Braeden was typical boy - which worked out nicely for this activity. He kept grabbing the crayons while shaking and spinning them. I don't think he really knew he was doing the intention of the project, he was just "playing" with the crayons. But it looked great.

Izzy's finished project.

And Braeden's CHEESE face!!

A New Year and a New Job

Well I have officially left my job.

My last day (December 21st) was so great. The staff took me to lunch and showered me with gifts. I cannot feel anymore special and loved!! I have a picture of the inside cover of the scrapbook they put together for me. Thank you to Jan for such a great treasure and for putting it together.

It has taken a lot emotionally for me to take this leap and I know it will still continue to be hard. Financially we may suffer a bit, my social life may go down hill, and in a very different way my new job is going to be quite challenging. BUT it's worth it.

I so look forward to experiencing many more moments like this picture Izzy drew several days ago.

She said "it's an indian". It clearly has a head, two arms and two legs (very proud of her!!). She also drew feathers on it's head and said, "Mimi would love this!".

She has started wanting to wear a backpack on her back. Which the first time I saw this on her I almost had a nervous breakdown. Because what mom really looks forward to the first day of kindergarten? - ugh.

All the more reason for staying home. Because I just can't get these precious moments back. It seems like they both grow an inch a day and learn 100 words a week.

I also really look forward to doing more things that I enjoy. I've learned how to start canning things with the help of my MawMaw.


Here are 15 jars of applesauce :)

Over the past 3 months or so I've also made peach jelly, canned peaches and canned pears.

I have literally worked since I was 15 years old. Yeah in the scheme of things this isn't really a whole lot of time. But in a way I feel like I've never slowed down long enough to really think about who I am. Staying home also grants me the time to talk to God, pray and seek his will for my life.

Hand it Over

I have decided tonight to completely ignore the load of whites in the dryer that need to be folded and the sink full of dishes leftover from dinner that need to be washed, because I need therapy. This whole blogging thing really is therapeutic and actually a little addictive.
This great need for therapy stems from last Tuesday morning. Out of the blue, I woke up with Bells Palsy. Sunday, a week ago, I had began experiencing a really bad earache never ceasing through Monday night. When I woke up on Tuesday morning I got straight into a shower as usual, and noticed that my right eye felt really weird. I got out and looked in the mirror and discovered that the right side of my face wouldn't move. I couldn't smile normally or blink my right eye. Naturally I go into freak out mode - thinking I have had a stroke or my ear infection is blocking a vein or something to my face that's going to make my whole face stop moving.
After a quick trip to Urgent Care I discovered that my diagnosis was in fact, Bells Palsy.
Bells Palsy Info.
It's actually quite common, little did I know.
The doctor put me on a steroid, Prednisone and an antibiotic, Acyclovir. And told me that MOST people return back to normal with complete facial function after 10 to 14 days.
Through this whole week I have been at war with myself.
When will this go away? What if it doesn't go back to normal? Why has God put me through this? Did I do something to deserve this? Am I not thankful enough for my health?
This week is my last week at work. Wednesday will be my last day, and all I can think of is how much I hate seeing these people who I won't see for a while- the way I am now. When I smile, I look like Elvis. I can only imagine the things going through their minds when they look at me. "Why did she make that face? Did I offend her? What's wrong with her?"
It's all very very frustrating.
After our sermon at church this morning and then talking it over with Chris this afternoon, I've really come to terms with this disease. Why would God put me through this? - because - he wants to be glorified in my healing. No one deserves the things that happen to them - they all happen for a reason. I know that everything we go through makes us stronger.
For now I have not seen a whole lot of improvement from Tuesday. I am able to close my right eye, not completely but almost. I still lack the ability to smile, taste things with the right side of my tongue, sip out of a straw normally, rub my lips together with chapstick, etc. Little things that I just took for granted - I now long to have back.
But God has a greater purpose than I can realize right now, and that is that. For now - I hang in there, have faith and give it to God. Because HE heals!!

Everyday an Adventure

We had planned on Saturday to have a photographer take family portraits of us for Christmas. We all know how when you 'plan' something, it always, well I won't say always, but sometimes will fall through. And, well....That's what happened.

We wanted to get pictures done this weekend so that we could go ahead and order Christmas cards to ship out this week. So - we just decided we would get dressed up in the clothes we had planned to wear and take the pictures ourselves.

It was fun needless to say.....Totally more work than it was worth.

Braeden running away, Izzy totally distracted.

Oh I know this is going to be bad...





Daddy making noises to get the kids to smile, but instead it makes them look at him...

This one's not so bad, but just having the chair in the backdrop instead of more of the Christmas tree, irks me a little bit.

Oh, I give up. And now have a headache.

I think this one is the best one we came up with. Even though Chris' face is a little blurred, his feet are in here and neither kids are smiling.

It looks like next year we might just go with plain ole' Christmas cards with no picture.

Differences

Well one thing that I've noticed these first couple days of being at home is how different my children are. Here is a picture of Izzy eating her lunch yesterday. She is ALL about NOT making a mess. And if she does get sticky, mess or gookeyness on her fingers - she freaks out! Literally freaks out until we get her clean.

My other child; however, wears it everywhere. Doesn't matter if it's on his face, his hands, in his hair - he could care less. As long as some gets in his mouth, he's happy.

We never had an issue with Izzy climbing things either. It seems as though boys must have a natural instinct to want to see what is at the top. And chairs are NOT meant for sitting. They are clearly made for standing, jumping, dancing, etc.




And lets mention the toilet. Yesterday Braeden discovered that you can lift the lid and put things in. We lost 2 bubble wands to the trash and were 2 seconds shy of losing the ipod - thankfully I got there quickly.

At the risk of embarassing my son one day - the one thing that my children have in common is dress up. When Izzy dresses up, Braeden has to dress up too. Here is Izzy wearing purple hair while Braeden rocks his blue hair - and a pink bracelet in his mouth. :)











Needless to say, I have not lacked for amusement these past 3 days.
It has all been worthwhile - this transition. Thursday morning Izzy made that very clear when after praying for her breakfast she prayed, "and thank you for letting mommy stay home with me today". - Broke my heart!!! and brought tears to my eyes!

And then today I was in the kitchen and I could hear Izzy singing in her room. I thought I could hear her singing the song that we had been practicing to learn a Bible verse, "Jesus is the Son of God - Acts 9:20" but I couldn't tell. When I got to her doorway she stopped singing and just mumbled and when I asked her to sing it for me again - she did. And it was totally what we had been learning since Tuesday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YfKoyPgIVs&feature=youtube_gdata_player


On a side note - please keep my mom in your prayers this weekend. She will be having her gall bladder surgery on Monday morning in Charlotte. With any hospital stay comes anxiety so please remember her and our family. Love you all!!